quiet and piles

Wow, I can’t believe it’s already been three weeks since I last posted! I’m trying to analyze why I haven’t written. Other than life being perpetually busy this time of year with weddings and graduations, throw in a funeral and on-going grieving process and add the process of one’s own daughter graduating, preparing for her grad party and the myriad details that come with college preparations and there just isn’t any space in the mind to let creativity run rampant! Piles of to-do’s and piles of things I need to remember clutter my brain.

It’s not just that, though. I think I self-sabotage by pressuring myself. “I’ve gotta write a post! It’s been x number of days!” The pressure prevents fresh thought. It paralyzes my brain.

Then, if that’s not enough, I think about all the people Les and I have told about my blog and I start thinking, “I don’t have anything to say! These people are going to read my posts and think, ‘What a waste of time!‘”

Perfectionism, as I wrote earlier, can paralyze me. “If it isn’t going to be great then I don’t want to do it at all!”

With all this going on in this crowded little head of mine, it’s a wonder I get anything written!

Well, now you have had a little peek into the mind of Kris Beauchamp! Crazy! Pathetic! I know! But it’s just the way it is!

The biggest reason though, is not creating quiet – not making quiet – not escaping early in the morning or late at night when the house is still and I can hear my thoughts. Quiet is essential to creativity – for me at least. I don’t know how other people find their sweet spot, but I have to create an atmosphere of calm, quiet, repose. My thoughts have to have space to collect and be shifted and sifted and marinated and cooked. Thinking takes time. It takes space. It takes energy. These are all precious commodities which are in short supply at this time in my life.

So, I thank you for your patience as I muddle my way through the piles of life! I probably need a good pair of boots and a shovel to begin excavation! Who knows what I might find underneath! There might actually be a couple of good ideas in there! Let’s hope so! And of course, you’ll be the first to know!

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19 Responses to “quiet and piles”

  1. Stephanie McConachie Says:

    Wow! I have to say this was very encouraging to me. I realized during the last few years that when I personlly stress or worry my artistic abilities shut down! Thank you for sharing your thoughts!

  2. Barbara Vierk Says:

    This was a favorite of mine, Kris. You not only explained the process of what it takes for you to write, but you wrote about what a busy life is like and I think most of us can identify with that. In our busy lives we wonder if anyone else has the same piles. A seminar on how to don some boots, hold our shovels and attack our piles of life would be good but just having someone let us know she has piles of life too is a comfort. I just got back from Chicago. I don’t just have piles of laundry, piles of tourist info, a stack of calls to return, a pile of shopping lists and the piles that were here before I left on the trip. I have piles of life and I will attack them with gratitude today.

  3. Ellen Says:

    Kris, you have simply hit the nail on the head of how all writer’s I know…including myself…feel. Self sabotage, other things that “need” to get done, no time, etc. We all do this and even though it sucks to feel this way, it’s nice know you are not alone. It is for me anyway. I love to write…once I sit down and just do it! 🙂 I love reading your blog, but it wouldn’t matter if I did or not. The best writing people do is the writing they do for themselves. Love you friend!

    • Kristin Beauchamp Says:

      Thanks, Ellen. It’s good to be reminded that I need to write for myself. I need to enjoy it or why bother! I did enough torturous writing assignments in school! Thanks for your encouragement! =) Kris

  4. Jan Lane Says:

    Kris, I think you could write the phone book and it would be interesting! You have a way of writing that is so enjoyable to read:) I Love you!!

  5. Nanci Hinman Says:

    Kris, I love reading your posts!! It’s like tuning in to read “a dear friend” whether it be daily or weekly, monthly, it always feels like “coming home to a enjoy a relaxing moment..” I so enjoy all u have to say, because you describe things in ways I never could… but you make it so vivid and understandable. Your honesty is a gift, Perfection would be hard to relate to, so I am thrilled you are so easy going …. Congrats to that “fourth grader” who grew from up from a young youth group kid to a beautiful adoring and Godly woman” I thank God for her shining example of God’s grace….and for your whole family everyday…We love you all!!

  6. Bonnelle Says:

    I love you dear blog friend because you sound so much like me! Thank you for being a real person and for the moments where you put yourself out here. It helps me to realize once again that I’m not alone.

    • Kristin Beauchamp Says:

      That’s always good to know, isn’t it? We aren’t alone. There is a commonality we share in dealing with what life throws at us! Thanks for reading and commenting! You bless me! =) Kris

  7. Tracy Says:

    I’ve been blogging for 9 years. Only in the last…2..have I given myself leeway to not post daily. It is ridiculous the pressure I put on myself with my blog – and I didn’t even have any expectations about who was going to read it!

    For me, blogging is a way of clearing my mind, to get to the quiet, rather than the quiet being something I need to let my creativity flow. My brain works so hard trying to manage all those other things that need to be done, that every now and then, using my blog for what I grossly term “verbal vomit” really does help.

    What you write here doesn’t HAVE to mean anything. And if somebody reads it, and thinks it’s boring or stupid or meaningless, well then they’re the ones who missed the beauty in the sharing of minds. Sometimes, write something completely silly, just to keep in touch with the kid inside. I promise, you’ll have at least one reader laughing!

  8. Claudia Kaser Says:

    You are in very good company! Thank you for letting the rest of us know that we are much more alike than we think! Good & otherwise! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  9. Barbara DeJesus-Dothan, Ala Says:

    I especially loved your lines about not making time for quiet….that has always been something I have struggled with…staying away from the quiet..I guess I never really wanted to “hear” what was really being said. The Lord has been so gracious with me in this area and has allowed my “noise”. He is now entering me into a season of quiet where I have to purpose to be quiet in me and around me…..it is certainly a journey.

    Write when you feel led to write, that is the freedom He gives us. Be blessed my friend. We are such an amazing creation aren’t we, made in his image!

  10. Karen Says:

    WE all related to where you are coming from. Overwhelmed at times,
    but knowing that in time GOd will give you His inspired words.

    We wait in anticipation to see what God will reveal to you so that we can
    stretch and grow. Please let me know if you need anything or any help
    for Baily’s graduation. We can’t wait to share in her special day.

  11. Gene Lassiter Says:

    Dear Kris,
    Sometimes having nothing to say can say a lot. Soon enough the weddings and graduations and even taxes will be behind us, but God’s love goes on forever. You and Les are God’s gift to the world on keeping focused on what really matters. Thanks, Gene Lassiter, Dothan, AL

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